I love words.
Good thing I suppose, given my chosen and hard-fought-for occupation. Every time I sit down at a keyboard or have a pen poised over a blank sheet of paper, I feel overwhelmed with excitement, with possibility, with anticipation. With a few key strokes or swipes of a pen, you can find the right combination of words that can make someone LOVE you. Conversely, you can break a heart, manipulate a mind or sever an allegiance…all with those same strokes or swipes. Think about that. Legends are immortalized because of words. Nations go to war over words. Couples are united in matrimony with words. Hearts and lives are shattered due to words. The power they wield is, in a word, awesome.
“Every time I come around the corner and see your car in the driveway I get sick to my stomach.”
I sat on the couch during yet another face-off with my mother when she let fly with that condemnation, effectively shattering any sense of comfort and belonging I may have been clinging to at the time. I was 17. I’m 38 now, and I can hear those words in my ear as clear as if they were uttered 10 minutes ago. I can’t say that it was those exact words that led to the eventual, unsurprising demise of my relationship with my mother, but I know it was certainly a huge chunk out of the already crumbling foundation. It stands, to this day, as one of the worst things anyone has ever said to me.
But, as I said, words are powerful. They have healing properties. Let me give you a scenario. I was visiting a friend at what is now, TCNJ (then it was Trenton State College). My boyfriend of about a year had just broken up with me, quite unceremoniously, at a party the night before. I was feeling kind of blue, just sort of moping around the campus waiting for my friend’s class to end. While aimlessly wandering through the bookstore, I saw an old friend from high school, a guy who graduated a year ahead of me. We got to talking about life after high school and what my plans were and all of that idle small talk, when he looked me right in the eye and said, “Well Cas, the thing is, I hear you’re an excellent writer.”
What followed is not a Cinderella-like ending of fairytale romance (this is me we’re talking about) between Matt Opacity (that was his name) and your English teacher. We didn’t fall into each other’s arms and swear undying love—it wasn’t even a romantic moment. He wasn’t trying out a brand-new pick-up line or even trying to soothe my bruised, dumped ego. It was a simple declaration that I am quite sure he would never even remember saying all these years later. But it’s impact on me was and is undeniable. Because of him, when I went back home, the first place I looked for a summer job was at a local newspaper called The Sandpaper. I landed a job as a stringer and at the tender age of 18, got my first ever piece of writing published. I even got paid for it! (It was an article on Tonkinese cats—don’t laugh!) Such is the power and the beauty of words.
So, that is the focus of this week’s blog question. I would like you to think about conversations you have had, arguments in which you’ve been embroiled, moments of bliss you have experienced. They all have one thing in common—WORDS. The Yin: What is the worst thing anyone has ever said to you? Why is it the worst thing? How did it make you feel? And for the Yang (because there always is one): What was the best compliment you have ever received? Who said it? Why was it the best compliment? And finally, what do you think these two things, what you consider the kindest and cruelest words anyone could say to you, reveal about your personality? Much to think about, I know. Don’t delay!! (500 words/80pts)
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Heh. Your question reminds me of a balloon. How it inflates and deflates. It's kind of like us. When compliments are given we inflate but when we are insulted, we deflate. Inflate. Deflate. Heh. Wow. I don't know why that thought sort of amused me. I guess everythig works within logic sometimes too. Thinking back in my past, there have been a lot of mean words said to me as I'm sure others have heard or been told as well. I remember walking through my middle school halls miserable afraid of the next person who will shout "chink" or "gook" in my ears. LOL. like this one time when this jock kid asked me where my tag that said 'made in china' was or when his friend asked me if my family bombed pearl harbor... it made me wonder if people got off on it. It definitely wasn't the worst things said but I could definitely say it was one of the worst which I could talk about and laugh at. At the time though, I felt like I was put in the corner. I was an alien, a minority, not one of them and I never physically showed it. I just kept to myself (surprisingly) and wrote my thoughts down on paper which sunk me in such anger and depression for a long while. But I'd just keep smiling and stay the foreigner that I am. As for the best compliment I ever recieved? I could think of a few but my favoritest one had to be that I am true. Coming from my best friend since middle school and from the several friends I could say I still have as well as my boyfriend and a couple of teachers. I always tried and stayed true to the people around me as well as being true to myself. It's good to know that people come to me when they need a good cry or a good laugh. When they wanted to hear my opinion and I wanted to hear theirs. When I kept their secrets no matter what. When I didn't lie to myself and become something I am not. It's a real good factor to know. And it meant a lot to me to know that I had such a quality since I have met many people along the way who definitely don't. To hear a compliment like that makes me feel special and it just warms my heart. What do the two reveal about my personality? A lot of mean things that have been said to me and if i actually took those into consideration, my description would be that michelle is a stupid poor crazy fat mean chinky bum who is also a true sweet caring open-minded friendly appreciative and random-kind-of girl. does it make sense ? sort of contradicts itself and i really dont know if that just reveals that maybe i contradict myself a lot as well. probably. i guess that's what it reveals, so yeah.
I honestly can’t remember what the worst thing someone has said to me would be. I can think of many horrible things that I’ve heard about me were, but I like to ignore them all and suppress them from my memory because none of them really mattered to me. The only thing I can think about that someone has said to me and has truly scarred/affected me is from a very particular person. I used to have this best friend for awhile back in the day. But this one friend constantly had beaten my soul and self-esteem. It was always a competition to her to be better than me. We were in many classes together so she would always compare her grades with mine. If she would get a better grade then me, she would laugh in my face and brag about how she was smarter than me. She didn’t exactly say. “You are stupid.” but she said things like “Haha, I’m better than you.” or “I’m smarter than you.”. It hurt me and it was always a battle and made her day to see that she was better than me. When my grades would be higher, I would never in a million years put a person down for having a lower grade than me. Ever. She would make excuses or make fun of me because a question I did get wrong “Was so easy that only retards would get wrong”. Or something along those lines. And it wasn’t always about school, either. We would give each other makeovers and she would tell me why I’m ugly. Either I have a big nose or my legs weren’t thin enough. Little things she just said out loud and I wanted to cry. I don’t know why I stayed friends with her for so long, but she certainly has changed me. I dropped her as a friend after being unable to put up with her. I see her often in school, but I will not talk to her. I hated being friends with her and she has made me insecure and quiet. I hate talking about my grades and I always put a test away when I get it back. I don’t like showing off my progress or letting people know what I got. I think many many people would be surprised of the grades I get, but I believe people mistaken my quietness for lack of knowledge. I have become timid and insecure with my schoolwork and my looks and I don’t think from this day, my ex-friend knows. She probably still has no idea why we aren’t friends anymore.
I’m not exactly sure what the best compliment was. I can’t even think of any particular phase or event that I went through for my best compliment. The only thing that I could guess of who the person was is probably my current boyfriend. I’ve been with him for a year and over the last year, I believe I have matured and grown out of my insecure self. He constantly compliments me and makes me feel like I’m on top of the world and I wouldn’t be surprised if he had told me my best compliment. He motivates me and lets me do my own thing and it’s great because I go to him with all my problems and he always helps me pick up myself when I’m down. I feel like a shining star when I’m around him and it just makes me happy.
These two things revealed that my worst compliment brought me down and my best compliment brought me to my greatest potential. With my response to my worst compliment, it reveals that I get affected greatly by things that people don’t usually mean to so or realize. It’s helped me learn to choose my words wisely before I tell someone something. With my best compliment, it probably reveals that I thrive on love. Love is what makes me happy and makes me reach out to others to try to make things better for those around me. My personality could be depicted from all this that I take consideration into everything thing around me and I let things get to my head. I think too much and have the littlest things effect me in good and bad ways or behaviors.
Well, when I first heard you talking about this blog in your other class, I almost immediately knew the exactly what I was going to write about. Almost! I knew exactly what my "Yin" story was going to be. I remembered exactly what was said word-for-word. It's not a big sentence at all, but the words that was said made me mad at my mom for a good amount of time. I almost completely neglected her. I wanted my mom to do something for me and she would not do it. I was mad because whatever I wanted her to do, it was very beneficial to me. She didn't want to do it because of her lazy spirit, and other variables. Whatever this was, I really needed her to do it, since she wouldn't I decided to annoy her until I got an answer because she was also ignoring me. after about 2.5 minutes she finally spoke. "...You act just like your father!" As soon as she said that I left without words. I refused to go near her or even say good morning. When she would say something to me I would reply out of respect, but other than that I would pay her no mind. This hurt me because my father is one person I refuse to be like. I loss a lot of respect for him. I also know how my mom feels about him. She tries to "front" and act like he doesn't phase her but I know the truth. So for her to say I act like someone we both scorn hurts a lot. It went on for about 9 days until she finally decided to apologize.
Immediately after I was done thinking about Yin part of my story, the Yang part came right after it, within a second. It was a day at church. My Pastor going on talking like he usually does. I'm probably dozing off. Then he calls me up to the front like he tends to do at times. He tells a story, says some good things, talks of my accomplishments, and reflects back on the past. Then he finally says, "Pernell I'm proud of you." I was "lost in translation." I didn’t know what to do or say because I almost and/or probably never heard someone say something like that to me. I blame that on my father. He claims that it something every father should say to their son, and he tells his story for more clarity. I think it was so special to me because, obviously my father has not said something like that towards me. From that moment allowed me to release some anger towards my father. I guess those stories are relative to each other because of father. The one thing that made me mad was hearing that in some ways I act like my father. Since that day I hate being compared with my father. When ever I talk to my brother on the phone we always end up in a conversation about how we are alike our father and how mad that makes us. When I hear a "father figure" say something so simple as "I'm proud of you" it made me a lot happier. Sort of like a loss a hate from my father.
Well, now I have had alot of horrible things said to me throughout my life. I choose not to remember them, nor pay them any attention. Doing that could only result in a negative outcome, or an output of negavity energy/thoughts. I have enough people to try and bring me down in life, I don't need to help them by thinking about crappy moments in my past. I try to think positive, to keep the ball rolling. On the flip side, I've also had many great and inspiring words thrown my way. I've had many teachers give me great forms of inspiration. I've always heard good things from my parents, but I chose something from someone of no relation to propose as the potential "kindest" thing ever said to me. I would go with some words from good ole' Mr. Souza. Haha. He told me that "Only Kevin Jepson can hold Kevin Jepson back." He let me realize that I can do whatever I want, as long as I am willing to work for it, and if I want something really bad, you best believe I'm putting it all on the line for my quest. Not only did these words give me self confidence in my intelligence, and special skills, but it helped me understand one of the concepts I base my life on daily. You get out what you put in, if you go about it in a intelligent, sensible way. It was monumental to me, because it came from someone who I probably will never see again after I graduate. Someone who has no ties to me, and reaps no benefit from my benefit believed I could be a great success. So now, I have the confidence and determination to be successful in whatever I choose to do.
Okay well whenever I get in BIG BLOW UPS with my parents which is not very often, but when it does there comments are not always my favorite. They always pull the “You can go live with your real mom/grand mom in Pennsylvania”. I think they believe this will scared me but it only makes me despise them for an hour until I forgive them. Even though I forgive them and know they would never go through with the threat it really makes me extremely furious. NOT the fact the threatening me but the fact there threatening me with a women who abandoned me and has caused much pain in my life. I told my parents the last time I got into a fight with them how I despise when they say they will send me to live with her and they stopped, now there new phrase is “ your 18 you don’t have to live here, if you don’t put in effort here leave.” It still pisses me off. Sure I wanted to be 18 so bad, but now that it has come I think that’s the only number I ever here out of my parents mouth. They always say make decisions, do things for yourself your 18, but then when I try o do adult things it’s always a battle. I don’t know parents are confusing, but I guess so are us children. But the one thing I can say about my parents is no matter what they are always there for me. I think them threatening me with this dreadful threat irks me so much because I believe no matter what your family should take care of you. I guess there are certain situations where your family stops talking to you but for the most part no family is perfect and families always need to put out effort. Sure, if I needed anything they would be there, but sometimes they say the wrong thing, and sometimes I say the wrong thing. I’m the type of person who likes to be showed affection and love. When I here those UGLY words come out of my parents mouth I just want to go crazy. When people are mad they tend to say things they wouldn’t necessarily say on a regular basis, but what people don’t understand is how much a few words could really damage someone. I’m sure if my parents knew I was writing this they would be furious with me for putting our family business out, but it is truly something that has impacted my life. This is the worst thing someone could ever say to me because I truly loathe m real mom so why would I ever want to live with her? That is just a cruel thing to say from my perspective.
Last year when I had surgery there is one thing I’ll never forget, my mom (Ann Marie). I was getting my IV in and just about to be put to sleep and my mother started balling her eyes out and said “everything will be fine, I love you.” Those words and tears meant the world to me. It just showed how scared she was for me, not saying I’m happy she was crying, but it showed how much she cared. It seriously brought a tear to my heart, to me my mother who I never have seen cry over me; maybe I made her cry when she was mad at me. But these were tears of love/fear of her daughter’s surgery. Seeing your mother cry because of your safety just makes you realize she would just die if something happened to you. I cannot even describe the way I felt when I heard those shaking words and saw those tears; it was the cutest thing I have ever encountered in my life. My mom and I tend to hit heads a lot and I believe it is because we have so much in common and I always felt like we would never get along and she liked my brother more, but what I witnessed that day changed my life. I told you I love affection, and being loved. She comforted me and made me feel secured. Sure I was like oh lord what the hell is about to happen she is crying! You will never conceive the feelings I had that day when I saw my mother cry, and say those few words in her shaky voice, but believe it or not it changed my view on life, on how just a surgery can bring a family closer.
I don't know if I could honestly peg anything that has been said to me as either the best or the worst thing. It's not that I haven't had some very nice or conversely incredibly horrible things said to me; it’s just that none of them have been particularly soul-shattering or inspirational enough to stand head and shoulders above the rest. Besides the fact that none of the many things that have been said to me over my seventeen years of life sticks out as the best or the worst thing, I think it’s rather unfair to the person being quoted. By saying that something from them was either the best or the worst thing you’ve ever heard, seems to sum up their influence on you in a single sentence. Take for example if I were to use the example of my little brother saying in all seriousness that he is ashamed to be my brother and thinks one of us might be adopted, it would seem that he and I had a hostile distant relationship when the reality is in fact far more complex. Just like if I were to quote some the incredibly nice things and compliments that have been paid to me by former teachers, it would seem as if I was the ideal student for many of these teachers, when in fact this is not the case. As many of you, Miss Bunje especially, knows my study habits are and have been for quite some time less than exemplary. And now in order not to seem like a cop-out I will mention some of the nicer things that have been said to and of me recently. When discussing my future plans with Mr. Cervi he mentioned that he thought I would make an excellent humanities professor and he had no doubt that I would be successful in my goal of achieving that professorship.
All my life i've been put through uprisings and downfalls. But through every argument i've been in, i dont necessarily remember anyone saying anything that was soo heart breaking. I can say that I recall someone calling me conceited. The FIRST time i herd that head banging word, I was in the eighth grade. Obviously it was a female, well it was my first year back comming from florida. I wasnt new to that school, i was just new to that female. I guess she wanted to talk to me in a special kind of way. Not being mea, i simply and nicely told her that i wasnt interested. From frustration, she tried to put me down and said, "thats ok cause your conceited anyway"! Even though that was the first time i was called conceited, it felt like i was being called that all my life. That's because i was always called a "pretty boy". I never paid that any attention because i seen it as a strange compliment( an annoying one though). But being called conceited seemed so much harsh. I see concieted people as someone who looks down on everyone else, thinks too highly of themselves and just thinks that the world revolves around them.
I cant say that i dont know why they call me conceited. Dont get me wrong im not saying that i fit the description of a conceited individual, and agree with their false accusation. Im just a yung man who takes good care of myself. I present myself with confidence, i belive in everything i do. I never thought, and I'll never think that i'm better than anyone else.
As far as the Yang goes (because there always is one): lol. I was told by my grandfather that i was taking good care of my mother. When he told me that i felt like i was king of the world. I never thought i could be so much of a help to anyone. And to just hear that im helping the one person thats means the world to me, is just one of the best feelings in the world.
These two things that brought my spirit up and down seemed to show me that im a well taken care of yung man that could help anyone who needs help. This would help me in life im sure of it.
There are many things that people have said to me that were the worst things in my life. But when my dad said these words to me, it completely tore my heart into pieces. My father is the kind of person who always thinks is right about EVERYTHING and everything has to be done his way, if not then we get punished. My father and I butt heads a lot mainly because I like to get my point across to him and explain to him how I feel. But everything that I say is wrong to him. No matter how much I cry and beg him to understand he just won’t budge. There was a certain argument that my dad and I got into that I will never forget for the rest of my life. Usually, when he’s mad he won’t talk to my sister and me for a good week. Whenever I try to make things better he just blows me off and makes me feel like s**t. Its always when he decides we wants to talk to will say something and when he does he has to take me out and makes me sit in the car for literally hours just to talk. Well this one time was the worst. We were talking and I guess I said something that he knew I was right she he grabbed me by my neck and said “you know what you mean to me, you mean s**t to me. That’s all you are to me!” Those words will never leave my heart. As soon as he said those words I burst into tears. Never did I imagine that those words would ever come out of his mouth. I felt as if I failed as a daughter. Every single night I think that my mom died for a reason and maybe one of the many reasons was for my dad and me to become closer. But it has been 6 years and all its done is pulled me far away from him. Don’t get me wrong I still care about him but it’s the fact that he knows that I lost a mother and he just doesn’t get it. I guess he thinks it okay because that’s the way he treats his mom. But like I tell him, he still has her and he should treat her better then what he does know because he might be gone with a blink of an eye. Hopefully one day he realizes the way he is and actually says sorry for the stuff he’s done.
One of my great passions is being with little kids. I love being with them and just watching them grow up. I don’t know exactly why I love them such much, its just that a different side of me comes out when I’m around them. Which I call my better side. I would literally call my cousins and offer them to babysit whenever they needed anyone. I would stop everything that I have planned just so I can go watch my baby cousins. I don’t know why, I just love being around them. They make me feel so happy and it’s like all my worries and problems just go away for those few hours that I’m with them. One day I was over my cousin’s house over the summer time. I saw that my cousin wanted to get in the pool but didn’t want to get in because her daughter was sick. I got out of the pull and told her to get it and that I would watch her. I laid on the hammock with her and swung back and forth until she fell asleep. I took her up to her room and put her in her crib. My cousin came in and said “you know angie, when you have kids your going to be a good mom” I will never forget those words. Those words made me feel complete. I know that when I get older I want to have kids and I want to be the best mom.
One 8th grade morning I was getting ready for school and got done early so decided to watch some TV. As I was sitting on the couch bored, the phone ring. Now this is at 6:30AM, no one calls at 6:30AM unless its an emergency. I knew right then something bad happened so I quickly went upstairs and found my mom crying. Without even knowing what happened my eyes started watering and then she told me “Aunt Christine died last night”. Right then I fell into my moms arms and we both cried helpless together. My mom quickly whipped my tears from my eyes and told me she is in a better place now, which is true. My aunt had cancer for some time and was going through a lot of pain. We knew the doctors only gave her a couple months to live but we were still shocked to hear she was gone. The reason why this was the worse thing that someone’s ever told me was because with just those 5 words made me realized that someone I loved and cared about is gone. It made me feel crushed because I love my aunt and never seeing her again hurt me. Also she had a fairly new husband and a baby at home and now my cousin had no mom to care for him.
The nicest thing anyone has ever said to me was also one of the most randomest. One day I was eating breakfast in my kitchen and my dad comes down stairs and says hello. After we had a little chit chat my dad stairs me right in the eyes and says “I want you to know that your mother and I are very proud of you and everything you do and were very glad you have a lot of friends and are very happy”. This was very awkward for me because it came out of nowhere but it made me feel great. I felt like that I am a good person and I do good things. I think both of these things say about my personality?
is that I really care about people and really appreciate what they say to me
Words do have a very powerful ability to be very emotional among different people. We are exposed to words on a daily basis. School work, love notes, song lyrics, text messages, newspaper articles on Tonkinese cats ... And yes, I could not help myself but to search Tonkinese cats on Google. And by the way, they happen to be a very beautiful breed of cat! Words have a very powerful way of gaining the trust, as well as the ability to mislead. Words can make your sunshine seem a million times brighter or strand you in a hurricane with no shelter in sight. Words, both positive and negative, affect people. This is why people should think before they speak, take into consideration the effects of what you say have on people, and know who you are talking to. The worst thing anyone has ever said to me was “I hate you.” As simple as those three words are, the effect was in fact devastating. To hear that, especially by someone that I actually cared a lot for and could never find myself to hate, hurt tremendously. It made me feel as if I lost the support and liking of that person, and by losing that made me feel like I lost a piece of myself. Hate is such a strong word. Some people throw it around and do not mean it when they say it. However, I do not take the word “hate” lightly. I feel as though you should not say anything that you do not mean. That reminds me of the phrase “Say what you mean and mean what you say”. The best compliment ever said to me was by my Grandmom. My Grandmom and I have always had a good relationship. She has a big part of my heart. She has told me time and time again since I was young “You are my doll baby”. It means a lot more to me than knowing that I have a cool little nickname “Doll Baby”. Those words have always given me such a sense of security and self worth that it has given me the ability to know that I am capable of anything and will always have the support of my grandmother. Those words are warming. Because I have been able to feel such great love from my Grandmom, especially through the way she has spoken to me in words, I feel as though it has been a big component in making me who I am today. Because I was able to feel love, I am able to love others. On the contrary, if I was verbally abused during my childhood, never told that I was loved or that I would ever make something of myself could have traumatic effects on a person. A person that experiences that may never have the ability to love or recognize love at all. That shows how powerful words are. I think that both the worst thing and the best compliment that has ever been said to me show a couple similar things about my personality. They show that the support of others gives me a very strong sense of security, which in turn allows me to gain confidence. Having those around me that I care for, and know they care about me is soothing. It shows how something as simple as a phrase can change someone’s life perspective, positively and negatively. Words are powerful things.
“Your words don’t mean sh** to me, why don’t you try doing something for once in your life.” This is by far the one of the worst things ever said to me in my life. That means that no matter what I say, do, anything; it will never mean the same as is did before. This was said to me 3 years ago via text message, and it has been engraved in my mind forever. This made me feel like the worst person walking the face of the earth, knowing that I can’t make it better with this person who I loved very much. It was a feeling of disgust with my self that I made such a mistake for someone to say that. To me that is the worst thing you can say to a person and if you do that person must have done more wrong to you than ever. I just wanted to crawl under a rock and get away from everyone and never talk to anyone again; but it’s a good thing I didn’t because that text changed me forever. At the same time this is the worst quote believe it or not it’s also the best compliment that someone has ever said to me. That saying changed my life and how I looked upon it. When I was told this my eyes opened and made me talk to my self like ‘what am I really doing with my life’. Ever since than I tried to always do better and just think before I do things, that text message honestly changed my life. Lately I’ve been slacking and because I think I forgot about when that was said to me and a week ago something around the same nature was said to me and it put me in the worst mood still cause I cant get it off of my mind. This reveals about my personality that I can change for the better and be a better person.
Hmm it is hard to recall the best thing that anyone has said to me. The words that hit home with me, I love you. But it is not just when anyone says it to me it is when my family tells me. When they tell me they love me it makes me feel appreciated. It gives me a sense of place in their lives and makes me feel important. However in the last week of my grand fathers life he was in the hospital he said two things that made me proud of what I had done so far in my life. I hugged him and told him I loved him. Then he looked me in the eye and said he loved me to and that he was proud of me.I cant tell u how suprised I was to here him of all people say that. He was the person i looked up to since I was young because everyday after school I would go to his junkyard so my grand mom could watch me. I would always end up watching him work and I wanted to be just ike him. He very rarely told me that he loved me and to add on that he said he was proud when I heard those words it brought a tear to my eye. I think the worst thing anyone has ever said to me was the first time I was called a redneck it made me feel like crap. I think it was partly because when I used to think of the word redneck i thought of some trailer trash. It made me pissed and I felt like flipping out on them. I went through the day and the more I thought of it I am a redneck by alot of peoples depiction of what it is and I have come to peace with that. Now I feel as if you think I am a redneck and you dont like it tough shit for you its my life and Ill live it how I want. I think that these words made me a more confident person and they showed me that it doesnt matter how you live as long as you are happy and proud of yourself to keep living like you are and things should work out for the best.
Wow. My mom will kill me for this if she were to ever read it but my mom was the one who said the most hurtful words ever. We were having a fight about my stepdad like always because he was being a jerk to her again and I told her you don't have to be with him. Your the only person holding yourself back from being happy. My stepdad had caused many problems between me, my mom and my sister such as my sister moving out and making me dislike my mom. I told her that no man is worth making a mother come between her children especially when he wasn't their father. Well, the my mom told me.."I would rather die than live without him. He means more to me than you and your sister." Yeah let's just digest that for a moment because I thought I was over that but it even hurt to type it.I will never forget those words my mother said to me because I still can't believe that a mother would honestly want to live without her children. Like I said in my other blog, I don't remember whch one, my parents are trying to make things up to now that I only have a few more months unti we graduate but nothing will ever erase those words from my memory. I still kinda hold a grudge to my mom becuase of those words. Like everytime I go to work or hang up the phobe with her she says I love you so much god bless you.I always just say ok mom bye.I can't remember when the last time was I told her I loved her because I know when she says it to me, to a certain extent she's lying because shell never love me as much as she loves a man that caused her so much pain for the past 17 years. Because of me bever having a father abd having a mother who says sucj terrible things.I have a lot of issues with people. I don't trust many people I don't get close to them because I feel like they will always hurt me in the end. If a mother can say such cruel words anyone can.
Now as for the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me was from believe or not my boyfriend. I've been with him for the past 3 years and he has helped me so much deal with my parents ridiculousness and deal with my only sister moving out. I called him crying after my mom told me she loved my stepdad more and he was in just as much shock as I was. My mom had honestly made me believe that I deserved the way she treated me because I was a horrible daughter because I wanted to beable to go visit my family that lived right down the street. (My stepdad believed that we all had to stay in the house when he was home to keep him company). So I didn't blame my mom at first I took all the blame saying if I was a better daughter my mom would love me more. But then my boyfriend said," no one deserves that, your a bright caring girl that anyone would die to have a daughter like you that will defend their parents even when they know what their doing is wrong". Those words hit me like a rock. I didn't deserve that. I am a bright girl. I don't smoke drink do drugs I don't go out I work to pay my own bills. I know that I deserve better in life and shouldn't punish myself over some ignorant words. My boyfriend made me realize I can depend on myself for happiness and I'm the only person I need.
“Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
Whoever thought of this quote must have been deaf. Words can be as gentle as they are brutal and merciless. What you say in any situation can completely alter someone’s perception, mood, and opinion when used correctly. It comes down to exactly how you say them. When used appropriately, words can lead the way to good fortune and joy for both you and all those around you. A simple compliment goes farther than one thinks and is sometimes the perfect remedy for a crappy evening. This applies in the alternate sense as well; a powerful insult can easily tear down those rules of self satisfaction and leave one wishing to jump off the edge of a cliff.
The worst thing ever said to me? It’s pretty hard to place, but I believe the harshest thing ever sent to me comes from my oh so lovable parental unit. “From what I know, all you do is skip classes, waste money, and fail. Grow up.” – Great encouragement! Thanks for everything, Miss. However, the fact that really tore at my insides was the lies she dared to utter to the entire family about me. She knows absolutely nothing about what happens here or anywhere else in my life, yet she dares to accuse me of being this horrid child with no goals, ambitions, or place in this world to not only me, but on the phone publically to my father. I have never skipped a class a day in my life and the money I use is mine to spend! I don’t think I had ever been angrier in my years; it was at that moment I had lost the last of the small amount of trust I ever held for that woman. Simply by gossiping to others, she had broken and relationship I could have had remaining. Not once have I ever had any physical quandary, but this mental battle and lashing of words has gone on since the beginning of time..
However, we can’t forget the positives! Life is not just a pit of depression waiting to eat the souls of all who dwell on this Earth. People are there to catch you and make you feel better; they will absentmindedly let you know when what you’re doing pleases them. My best friend is like a brother to me; it’s to the point that I solely refer to her as “bro” due to our relationship and pairing as the Mario Bros. on practically any game featuring them. I talk to this person practically every day now, but one day in a public setting, during some drama in a chat room, we were in perfect sync in an argument and planning on the issues. I won’t bore with the details, but the ending results were amazing. The words, though typed and masked by the “Guhuh!” noise I’ve officially made my “messages received” AIM noise, would send my heart aflutter and make me feel like the most important person on the face of the Earth!
“You’re the best brother I could of asked for. You’re just what I needed.”
I’m honestly not too sure how much the above quotes can reveal about me or my life in general. I suppose if anything I do enjoy knowing that the things I rarely say actually do have their effects. The stories themselves provide a peek, but the words of someone else can only go so far when trying to describe a different person. Like we just got done saying five minutes ago, we mask our true selves behind—Huh, how ironic. We use the power of words to hide our identity!
“The pen is more deadly than the sword.”
Throughout my life, I've had many experiences of pure bliss & many of pure dissapointment. I've heard people say alot of nice things about me, and alot of cruel things. Out of all these thing's i can think of two thing's someone has said that i would condsider the worst things ever. One of them is when a boy named Platt told me that all black people stink & have a weird odor thats why he didnt like black girls. This hurt me alot because he was basically steriotyping all girls. Even though I knew personally that I didnt have a weird odor, it still hurt my feeling to know that people still had that sort of mind set.
Another mean thing I've had said to me was that I would end up just like my mom. Considering the fact that my mom got pregnant and fourteen & was addicted to drug's almost all my life, I wouldnt consider that anything good, and that had to be one of the worst thing's said to me. When this was said i didnt talk to that person for almost two week's because i was really hurt by this comment and it really went deep.
The negative comment's i recieved also impacted me, because i wanted to make sure i prove that person wrong & not become what my mom was. So because of that I havent drank or smoked ever, and I'll be the first on my mom's side to go to college and make something of myself unlike her. In the long run this negative comment was actually a good feedback, because it made me a better person, but despite this is was the meaniest thing anyone could ever say.
At this moment, I cant really think of the nicest thing anyone has said to me. Of course i enjoy nice comments, but I can't think of the nicest. One thing i know, is that i love when people call me beautiful rather then sexy, cute, etc. it's just something about it that makes me feel good about myself, and when boy's say im sexy I feel like there just looking at my body & not me as a person.
This has to be one of the hardest blogs to write about for me, I cant remember the worst thing someone has said to me but the one that popped right in my head was when my father said I am the worst son out of the five of us. I was in 7th grade getting home from school on a Friday so like any other kid I was so excited for the weekend and no school. It was May so the weather was so beautiful and I ran upstairs as soon as I got home to get changed. It wasn’t till after dinner when I was getting ready for the night and I was on the computer talking to everyone on AIM, since that is what every kid my age did, when my older brother Jeff asked for the computer. Since he is older than me and I respected him and it was only going to be for a few minutes I let him on. He finally got off as I got ready and I hopped right back on. As soon as I did that my little brother Glenn started to Complain and cry is eyes out for the computer. At this time he was around 11 years old so he was still a young jerk. I told him that I would be done in no time and to just leave me alone for a few minutes, He did not listen. So he sat behind me flicking my ears, hitting my back, basically trying to get me to hit him so I would get in trouble. Normally I can ignore his stupid little games but it was going to far. The one time he hit me I got pissed off and jumped out of the seat and he fell to the floor with me over him about to punch him in the arm since I never hit him the face. Then of course with my luck my father comes in right as I am over him and starts yelling at me and he starts to cry, I try to plead my case but there was no chance. He starts yelling and screaming and tells me I am not allowed out. I started to freak out and curse at him which I know was a big mistake. He finally says I am not allowed out and I was so mad I didn’t even say anything I just ran out. Basically I ran away from home for the night, And came back around eleven without anyone knowing where I was or what happened to me. So my mom was flipping out and was going crazy even though she knew I was not serious about never coming back. This may not be the best thing that anyone has said to me but its one of my favorite things was when I was a junior and we were playing mainland. Our defense of coach is not that type of coach who you can look to say nice things about you, he basically calls it as he sees it. If you mess up he would let you hear it and if you did well Then he would sort of complement you. But he usually pointed out the flaws in everyone even if you weren’t doing anything. Anyway that game was our second game of the season and since Achey broke his leg, Danny was the new middle linebacker with my backing him up. At that time I only played Offense and did not practice defense at all. And with my luck Danny gets hurt in the first quarter, they throw me into the game without me knowing the plan for the game and going up agents the best quarter back and running back in the CAL. I played fairly well I guess since at half time when my coach was flipping out on the team and he looks at me and says, “Blake Rosario ill tell you what, Your doing a hell of a job out there and I am proud of you cause you weren’t ready when we called your name and you earned yourself a spot.” That made me feel good since he was the one that said it and it was a shock to me and the whole team. It also gave me the starting spot at middle linebacker for the rest of the year. I think this makes shows that I have a short temper with some sort of things and I can let it go way to easy when I shouldn’t. I should clam it all down and take it easy cause it will all be fine in the end.
Being a child of divorce, being abandoned by my mother, and having a step mother that I highly dislike SUCKS. My step mother has been apart of my life for 11 years and she knows most of the things about my mom and the terrible things she has done. She also knows, for a fact, how much I love my mother, even though she has left me and how I take comments about her very seriously. My wicked step mother plays the role of the yin, she's the one who said the most cruelst thing to me. I remember these words clearly, and to this day they run through my head every time I look at her.
I remember it being a nice, sunny day in the summer and my step mother, step sister, and i were sitting on the porch in the backyard, underneath the umbrella. I don't know how we got on the subject of my mother, but we did, and I was talking about how much I missed her. Then she said one of the lowest things she possibly could to me, and it was this, " I hate your mother and she is a bad person,". I remember just staring at her like I can't believe this woman just said that to me, I was in total shock. She was telling me how shewas a bad person because she left me, how she went to jail, steal, and go to our house when we were not home. However, that is besides the point, how could you say that to me. i mean I already feel bad enough that she left me,but for to go on and on about her like that and have those words come out her mouth, absolutely mind blowing. I must say what my mother did wasn't right in anyway but I still love her and she isn't perfect. My stepmother had no right to judge her like that and call her a bad person because in my eyes that wicked woman is worse than my mother.
As for the yang in my life, that would have to be my brother. He said the nicest thing to me ever and I never felt better in my life about myself than the moment those word came out of his mouth. Over this past christams my family and I went to my brother's house to open gifts. I was having a great evening and I loved my presents. Now, before I tell you what he said, I would like to set the view of me and my brother's relationshiip. My brother and I are like 2 peas in a pod, eventhough we are 8 years apart in age. We never fight, only for fun when we do, and we are always making each other laugh. For as long as I have lived I have never once heard my brother say I love you to any of my family or anything loving or heart to heart in that matter. However, this christmas night i will never forget what he said. We were all getting our things together to leave my brother's house, when my Uncle Sam came up to me and said my brother was proud of me for all my good grades I have had through highschool and all the academic success I have had, considering the fact not one of my family members has graduated from highschool, including my brother. This coming June I will be the first one.. YAY! Anyhoo, I looked at my Uncle Sam and said no way, those words didn't come from my brother. So, since I didn' believe hime he asked my brother right in front of me. I remember this strange pause from my brother for a moment and he looks at my uncle and me, then says, " shh..you weren't suppose to tell her that," with the most genuine look on his face. I felt so proud of my self and felt as if I accomplished something by my brother saying that. Eventhough he didnt directly say Kelsey I'm proud of you, the comment he made was ever so soothing and one I wont ever forget, especially coming from him.
What these two things say about my personality is that I will fight for my the ones that I love and won't take any crap from anyone who has to say anyhting negative about them. It shows that I'm caring and protect who ever I fell I need to. For the nicest thing, it shows i try to make those around me happy and proud of me, and to show I'm not a failure and I won't give up because those around me had died off and quit.
it hard for me to specificly say i ever let anyones comments to effect me becasue i let thing blow by because i don't like to deal with drama it not me bunje. but if anything did bother me it would deffently be from someone i care becaasue i take their words to heart so let me think. i believe that it would be this time that i messed up pretty bad and i had to some home to tell my parents what i did and i was waitig for them to start yelling at me but they didn't. they were calm withthey deep sad eyes like a puppy trying to say sorry after they went bathroom in the house. and they told me "I am not mad at you im just disappointed." to me that worse then them screaming their lungs off or taking anything away from me. let me tell you when they said that to me i felt myself shit my heart out i remeber crying my eyes out telling them to punish me or yell but they didn't they just kept it up their act and it was a good one. if it was but it deffently made me never do that again trust me..... but lets get off the bad and move on to the good. to me the best thing that could happen to me is for me to succeed on making my goals come closer to happening so, the best thing that i was told was that my teachers or should i say my chefs at school told me that they see everything potential of me being a well known chef so they announced that i have deserved the oppurtuinty to be the youngest person to work in a casino. when i heard them say that i felt a tear run down my face becasue i worked my ass off to get the chance to prove everyone that a women can be much better then a man as a chef.
to me if i look back on that it shows that i take in what people say to me that are close and deffently change my thought on it so that i can see their views and that i work my butt off to make it happen so i believe that my character is a strong will and wise for my age and it should keeping growing hopefully.
Words are a definitely scary. They are taken for granted each day and often used out of text. I honestly never really looked at “words” as being so important. With every word that is said, a mind can change, a emotion can burst out. It really is amazing.
Looking back on my life there were a lot of bad things that were said to me. The worst was probably when someone who was very close to me told me that they hated me. Those words meant so much to me that I cried for days. The impact they had closed a chapter in my life. I will never forget those words and the way I felt right before, during, and after they were said. When some one who you don’t really care for tells you that they hate you, you brush it off. Because you don’t care for them, you don’t care much of what they think. On the contrary, when someone very close to you says those words and you know that they are serious, it burns a whole in your heart. When it happened we were in an argument, this person and I. It was years ago, probably about ten years ago, but I will never forget it. Ever since that day I never acted the same towards this person. I don’t like this person, though I still respect him. Those words hurt me, but made me stronger. I think that because I didn’t retaliate or say anything back, I proved myself to be the bigger person. I know this person will never apologize, and unfortunately I could never accept them for who they have become as an adult.
The best compliment I ever received was from my boyfriend, Rodney. One time he called me “angel” in a text, being the blonde that I am I giggled and texted back, “babe, that’s not my name!” He quickly replied, you came into my life just when it was crashing down; you always look on the bright side and keep a smile on my face; you never put me down and support me with everything I do; you are an angel baby, you’re my angel.” That’s the exact words, I know because I saved the text! Even though it was just it text, it meant so much to me. I never knew I could impact some ones life so much. In my whole life, well, the past 18 years, no one has ever told me how fortunate they were to have me in their life. It sort of came as a surprise to me, even thought he usually says cute stuff. I swear he must get his stuff offline because he is really romantic and that’s definitely rare.
These two things, the ying and yang, made me who I am today. They shaped my personality and helped me become the person I am today. Every word has a strong meaning. Words are powerful, maybe a little too powerful for humanity.
The worst thinkg anyone has ever said to me was "I hope you die". This was the worst thing that they could have said to me because there have been three times that I almost could have. It made me feel sad and like I wasn't wanted but thanks to my freinds I forgot about what they said and never spoke to them sence. The best complament I ever recieved was "thank you". A random person said it to me during the santa run with the fire department. This is the best complement because firefighters don't get it enough for what they do and sacrifice. It felt weard to hear it and shake his hand but at the same time it felt real good because it showed that someone acctually cares about the men and women of the fire department that volunteer their time and risk their lives to keep the community safe. They reveale that I am not perfect and am more than meets the eye. They show that I don't care what people think of me but like when people aknowledge that I am a person who wants to help when ever can.
I would have to say that the worst thing that someone has every said to me would have to be when my family says I am just like my mother. While that may not seem so bad to some people what can be so bad being just like your mother. Well the joke in the family is that they call my mom the “bitch”. I don’t like being called the bitch to much and it seems that whenever my family members from my mom’s side of the family comes around; someone brings it up and I get into this huge blown out argument with one of my family members. It’s not as much the fact that they say I am like my mom that bothers me it is the meaning behind what they are saying. I don’t think I am a bitch at all and it hurts me to think that my family views me in that way and that they say that about my mom. To make matters worse things get really heated at moments when it comes to me defending myself over not being a bitch which only makes me seem like one. I don’t think that this is a totally horrible thing there could be a lot worse things but I truly don’t remember something that someone has said to me that made that huge of an impact on my life.
But on a better note many people tell me how I am such an easy person to talk to and how I give wonderful advice. Someone ounce called me Dr. Phil to some that may not seem like a compliment to me it seemed to be one. I like knowing that I can help someone out in some way even if it doesn’t seem like it is all that great. The majority of my friends tell me that I am a very good listener which means a lot to me. Both of these things seem totally different so to think it is true that someone could be both of these things but I guess I am.
Junior year one of the most challenging years of my adolescent life, as of now I began to embark on my adult life unfortunately. Yet during this difficult year I received the worst comment and best compliment of my life.
It was the beginning of the year, which meant I had a lot of time to prepare for my “big” track season. My father was so excited, he took me to get specialty running flats and everything. For him this year meant everything track wise, for me I had already lost all hope after being injured two years in a row. Well I was supposed to run cross country that fall, which was a joke. I am a natural born sprinter and you want me to run for hours at a time, HA. So what did I do? Avoided practice at all cost. Eventually my lies caught up with each other (another reason why I was so miserable I hate lying I literally get physically sick, even when I’m lying to my parents.) My coach and dad talked and they realized that I had made exactly three practices the whole season. At this time I become disowned by the family, since sports revolves there lives. They took my phone, made me clean, and whatever went wrong in the house was blamed on me. One morning I woke up late for school, my dad had to take me to school. As were drive to school the car was completely silent. As we pull up he goes into a tangent about what’s obviously bothering him. His exact words were “You’re a lazy fuck, you will amount to nothing. Stop wasting your life away.” All because I didn’t want to run cross country. I was doing drugs or stealing, I wasn’t knocked up or a fugitive. I left the car in tears.
It took me a while to realize that he really didn’t mean those words. It also took me a while to realize that those words weren’t true, thanks to Bunje. I then a few months later received the best compliment ever. One morning as we’re in the library crowding around Bunje we start talking about the one word people would describe us as. So I ask Darrell “If you could describe me in one word what would it be?” After a brief pause he responds “Amazing…” Bunje than says “I agree.” I swear my smile must have stretched as long as the Nile River I was so flattered. Out of all the compliments I’ve received in my life none compared to that one word. It wasn’t one of those bullshit compliments girls exchange with each other just to be nice like your outfit is adorable or your hair is beautiful today. It meant so much because I knew that he meant it that he truly thought I was amazing and not only him but Bunje too. It was a compliment I needed to hear and one that will stay with me. I see my self in a court room preparing to speak and telling myself “You are amazing.” Because now I know I truly am.
the saying "sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never her you" i never really did get the saying because i had sum words that were said to me that cut me deep like a knife. i'm surprised til this day that i haven't murdered this person with a slow and painful death and i say this with passion but killing him wouldn't satisfy me because it will always be in the back of my mind. i would more likely want to torture and let him live so he could remember me. and it would also make think before he speaks. but to bad that i don't have the heart to do that to a person i just leave it in gods hands because he has more power then i do. but besides that worse one the second worse thing that someone has ever said to me was "i thought she was like the girls from Philly" i wouldn't have cared so much if it didn't come out my FATHERS mouth. what he was trying to say was he thought i was a typical ghetto girl. that wont have a future for herself, that's going to get preg in her teenager years, typical stuff like that. And the other F up part was once when he found out about what i was doing in my life like getting my own shop he decided that "Oh let me be involved maybe i might get some money out of it" its like to him "if it don make money then t don't make sense" which is a shame because he has six kids and he thinks the way you raise them is by tossing money at them. where's the tender loving care? i cant even answer that question because i haven't seen it the eighteen years i've been living. and for the best compliment i have ever received is something i cant tell you because i don't even know. i mean i do get them but for this blog there just minor it compliment that everyone gets once in a while. i think was my dad said reveals that he had a huge impact on my life and with him saying those word crushed me. but me being the person that i am. that comment made me a better person. it show that i can strive to be a better person.
Going through my memories, that I can remember, the worst thing that anyone has ever said to me or even implied was that I was stupid. This to me is the worst thing you can say to anyone. This word, well not the exact word but it was implied, first was said to me by my sister. My sister knows that I’m not the best of spellers and once in a while to prove her point she bring this up in a way that makes me feel like I should still be in first grade. This really irks me because stupid is a word that makes you feel like you have no brain or that you’re a little bug that someone just squashed. Anyway nobodies stupid their just not well versed on certain things. Whenever my sister implies that I’m stupid the rest of my day my confidence is low and I know that it’s not true, but it just gets to me and I can’t help it. The best compliments that I received in my life so far are when anyone thinks what that my work is nicely done. The compliment that really rocked my sock was a couple of months ago when I was in art class (not in school). That day I was drawing a huge chess piece and I thought it looked horrible until my friend walks up out of nowhere and starts telling me that it was awesome. It made me look at my work through better eyes and I actually felt better about myself. To me that is the best compliment because sometimes I really worked hard on a project or I just couldn’t get to work right and I spent a long time on it, to hear that someone appreciates my work just makes me feel like I actually did something right for a change. These two things reveal that I really care about my work and that I really care about what other people think about me. To me they say this because I have always been like this ever since I started school. I always wanted to be praised by my teachers and that care over to how I think at home. If I did badly on something I would be in a bad mood the whole day or think about it the whole day and that is how I am today, but less intense.
Wow personal stuff right there Bunje. This is a pretty tough question because I normally don’t think too much about when someone says something mean to me. When someone says a nasty comment about anyone, I don’t think it’s something to take personally. I think most of the time those people that do talk, have a bigger problem with there self then with the actually person they are talking about. If I can wake up every morning feeling good about my self then why should I care what that person has to say. I mean of course you have those people in your life that are close to you and you respect there opinion. But when it comes down to it why do they really matter? People are always going to have something to say but the only thing you can do is choose how to react towards it. I honestly can’t think of something bad someone has said to me because I just don’t care. Words of hate usually just bounce off of me because why should I care what they are saying. It’s my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to. I figure this is better then me writing, “Ah Bunje I can’t think of a time someone said something mean.” Trying to find a good compliment that someone has said is hard. Its not the fact people don’t say good things, its just I don’t pay attention to it. The most recent compliment I received was from You ( Bunje). After waiting two painful days to get my grading sheet on my presentation I was shocked to see what was written. I know I did well on my project but I wasn’t expecting this comment. I am not going to post it because A. It’s a long comment and B. ITS MY BUSSINESS! How did this awesome comment make me feel? It made me feel that I m going somewhere. I recently felt like that I have been stuck in this one place my whole life and nothing has changed. Reading Bunjes comment was really refreshing and made me feel like that I have grown up a bit. It made me realize that I have changed since the 10th grade and for the better. It was really nice hearing positive feed back from a teacher for once. Ha I honestly don’t know what someone could say to me to make me crack. It would have to be someone really close to me and something really “cruel”. The kindest thing someone could say hmm pondering…. I think anything kind is awesome but what would separate all the other compliments from the rest is someone that notices what I can do. Someone notices that I have many different skills and can point them out. I like people that can appreciate other people for the things they do. Being appreciated is a big deal because in today’s time we take for granted what other people can do. We never just take a chill pill and notice some ones achievements. The worst thing is once that person is gone we realize how special that person was and what they stand for.
I have been doing blogs for two years now and this is the first one that has given me trouble. I have been thinking for 45 minutes now and I can not think of anything that really hurt me. The only thing that I can think of is something that my 6th grade math teacher said to me. I have always been great at math, it doesn;t matter what kind of math, i'm good at it. I'm the student that can sleep in class everyday and still get a hundred on the test. During the whole first marking period I got As and Bs on all the test, but I still got a D in the class. I felt like she didn't like me. Every time she game me back a test, I would have to check it because she would always mark question wrong that were right. After I told my mom this she got mad and called the school and it was a big fiasco. Well one day in class I was not paying attention in class and she asked me a question and I got it wrong. She proceeded to tell me how bad I was at math and how stupid I was in front of the class. Now very few things make me mad, but that made me furious. She didn't just insult me, but she insulted my intelligence also. It made me so mad that I decided to try my very hardest in that class for the rest of the year. I was vindicated when I got a hundred on every test for the rest of the year. I was also vindicated the next year when she was fired because of more parent complaints. The best thing that anyone ever said to me is actually said to me quite often. It is a very simple thing to say, but it always makes me happy to hear it. A simple "good job" is the best compliment that I can get. Whether it is a teacher or my boss saying it, whenever I hear it, I feel a sense of accomplishment. It makes me feel good to know that someone else liked what I did. I think what my math teacher said to me and my reaction shows that I value my intelligence and that I have a little bit of a competitive side. The "good job" compliment shows that I care what other people think and sometimes I need a little bit of encouragement.
Ah, conversations. That word has a very negative connotation for me right now....Lately there have been countless arguments that all lead to the same thing. There has been a lot of hurtful words said to me and about me. The recent ones that I can recall are,"It's hard to have a girl right now" and "I don't have time for you." These two things are the most hurtful thing that you could possibly ever say to me. Mostly it's because of the fact that I put my all into everything and for someone to just blatently say those words with just a blank face is shocking. Like how are you able to react to something like that without seeming immature. Another reason these are hurtful words is because my dad would always make promises and not keep them which has affected me a lot growing up. It makes me feel like crap and it eats away at me. I get knots in my stomach, anxiety increases, and the thought of the words seem like they're taunting me. It's the worst possible way to feel. As far as good compliments, I get them everyday from various people. I'm not really sure if I can say that one compliment is better than another one because they are all equally as good and perfectly used during various situations. From my parents it would be,"We know that you are going to do great things in your life;we're so proud of you." From my friends it would be,"You're like a sister to me. I can tell you things that I can't to anyone else and I know you'll always be there for me." These right here are among the few that I don't take for granted. My parents really have faith and believe that I can truly make something out of myself which any kid would be happy to hear. My friends are like family to me and so whatever they say I hold dear to my heart and don't take for granted. The cruelest words doesn't really reveal anything to me about my personality because I'm pretty independent. All it means that the guys are jackasses. The kindest words reveal that I am a caring person, an amazing friend, and that I try to be the best that I can.
Words are very powerful things. People always say the old saying sticks and stone may break my bones but words will never hurt me. I feel this saying is only true for some people but definitely not for everyone. For a lot of people the littlest thing said to them can ruin their day. For me I do not really let what people say get to me. Sure there is some things that can be painful but I try to ignore it. I do not really remember the worst thing that was said to me word for word but it was from my mom. I had done some stupid stuff the night before and when I saw my mom the next morning she cursed me out. This was the first time she has ever cursed at me in that way. Also it was probably the maddest I have ever seen her get at me or anyone for that matter. This shows that I truly care what the people I am close with think about me. It also shows that I never want to do anything wrong by them and never to anything that would upset them. When she said the things she did I felt horrible. I felt like the biggest asshole and I felt like such a screw up. The whole rest of that day I just sat around thinking about how mean I was and how I never would do anything like that again. Once again I can not recall what the best thing said to me was. As you can tell I am not too good at remembering those types of things. I think it would have to be something my mom said. I don’t remember what it was word for word but she was just saying how proud of me she was and how I made her a proud parent. I do not remember why she was saying this I think it might have been when my boss told her how I was a good worker and how I was very dedicated. Her saying that felt very good and I really felt like I had accomplished something very important. I think it was the best compliment because it was a true heartfelt compliment and wasn’t just a simple “good job.” This shows that I take pride in my work and when someone notices it and lets me know that they noticed it, it is one of the best feelings. As I was saying before I do not tend to remember what people say to me. I remember actions more than words so in my opinion actions are much stronger than words. Sorry Bunje its true though. When someone says something to me yeah I remember but if someone does something that affects me I tend to remember that much more than I would the spoken word.
Well, the best compliment I’ve ever received came in a 2 page long text. I’m not sure if it’s the best compliment I ever got, but it happened not too long ago so it was easy to remember. It was from my friend Loie. I’m not going to type it out because it’s so long, but basically she sent it to me because I was crying my eyes out. It was over my stupid ex boy friend who I was fighting with all day. I don’t know if I can even consider him my boy friend because we weren’t together long at all, but I was just extremely upset because all he did was fill up my head up with nice things, and out of the blue he ended things. Anyway, I was crying towards the end of school and she knew I was upset. She tried texting me and talking to me during the day, but I didn’t answer. So right before I went to bed, I got a two page long text that just really made me feel better. It basically said everything your best friends tell you when a guy breaks up with you. Your so fun, pretty, and better than him, and that he’s an A**hole and etc. I still have the text saved because the way she wrote everything and how she really wanted to see me get better made me feel great. It probably sounds really corny to you, but at that moment it really made me 10 times better. I didn’t do a too good of job describing what she said in the text, but it made me realize that I am better then the things he was saying to me to put me down.
Well, the worst thing that anyone has ever said to me wasn’t really words. It was more of a sound that a few guys decided to start yelling at me because they thought it would be fun to make me upset. Well, it was sophomore year and I heard the sound once before but was so confused as to what the sounds was. Well I rode my friends bus home, along with two of our other friends, and my friends bus was filled with her two brothers, and three other of their friends, plus another friend they called on the phone to make the noise at me. Well I got on the bus, and they all started to make the noise. I still was unsure wtf it was, but I overheard one of the guys tell some random guy I was sitting with who started it what is was, and I just started to cry. The guy who was a senior at the time, (who was SO CUTE) felt bad though, and put his arm around me and said it was okay. But anyway, you can laugh at me all you want, but the sound was off of Find Nemo. You know, the part when Dory is making a whale noise. Well if you couldn’t tell, like all my friends are skinny and really pretty. And i'm fine knowing I'm not like them, but I still thought it was beat for fun, the six guys would all make the noise, all at the same time. And being only like 15, it was hurtful. Having like five guys making this obnoxious noise, having another one on the phone, it was pretty freaking messed up and embarrassing! I don’t know if you think I’m stupid or not for getting upset over this, but anytime I saw any of them in school in the halls, over my friends house, or wherever, they would just make the terrible whale sound, and believe me its not fun knowing these 16 & 17 year old guys find entertainment out of making me cry and harrassing me. It lasted until the end of the school year, and slowly died down. I hear it every so often and it still hurts. It is really embarrassing to talk about, but I know this is one thing I won’t ever forget.
What I think of the kindest and cruelest things anyone ever said to me reveals about myself is that I definitely care way too much about what other people say to me. I revolve all of my emotions on how I get treated by others, and often its not good things. But, I don’t think it will ever change. I always try to do what makes other people happy, don’t like having issues, i can't stand being embarrassed, and I’m really self conscious about myself. I know all of these things aren’t very good, but I do want to change them.
I have had a lot of terrible things said to me in my life. My good for nothing birth father has done nothing for me but give me a child support check and say some rude stuff. He is upset that I keep him out of my life. He told me that Im not going to be sh** in life and that me been born was a mistake. That hurt me deep down but i knew that I had to get over it.He apologized but I just ignored it. I told him that I would never forget what he said. He said he had a bad day but that still isnt a excuse. Everybody has bad days but you have to deal with it. It is the worst thing because it made me feel worthless and not wanted. When my step dad found out he wanted to fight and seriously injury him but I told him it wasnt worth it. The best compliment that I received was said by a grandma before she passed away. She said that I was a good kid but just have to make smarter decisions. Back in the the day, 5-7 grade I used to get good grades but make dumb decisions. I used to fight and rob people for no reason. My older cousin was a bad influence on me. He was 11 and he was 17. My grandma forced me to stop hanging around him I became the person I am now. They reveal what has shaped you. Two stories that had a impact on your life. Even if they were bad. Your personality shows even if you dont want it to show. You can be quiet and you still are going to have a personality.
“WORDS” there is an infinite amount of words and more and more are made as time passes and times change. With every passing decade comes new ways or phrases for expressing ones self. And that just adds on to the number of words that can be combined or to insult you or inspire you. I’ve never been the one to take much offense in what someone says to me , but if there was a remark I remember, that in a way subconsciously continues to taunt me, there is . My Freshmen year I ,like most juveniles do, found myself in a situation where my pride was being tested and I choose to defend it. I let my challengers undo the morals that my parents had built in me. I got into a fight with these twins Brittney and Brianna the two most annoying voices you will ever have the dishonor to hear. I see now that the words they said did nothing to me,I don”t even remember them to tell the truth, but the actions I took to stop their lies only echoed a message that I could of never noticed , but someone else did. Mrs. K was a former vice principal at Oakcrest. She was the one I had to answer to when our conflict escaladed into a scuffle. It was in my lack of remorse for what I had done that she looked at me straight in the eyes and told me I WASN’T GOING TO AMOUNT TO ANYTHING, SHE then went on to refer me to alt. school. Those words dented my ego more than a 2 ton wrecking ball could have. I took those words to the heart and even thought I know there a lie of the devil, I haven‘t forgotten them. Even though I have yet to see her since that day because she left to another school district, I still can’t forget those words. She made me feel as if I had no reason to live. I felt as if I had no purpose and I felt anger towards her because she didn’t know me. To her I was student # 00000065479 and she had proclaimed failure over my life, spoken death into me. And as Ying is to Yang the equal yet opposite there was a few word spoken to me I can also never forget. It was earlier this year after a youth retreat to the Pocono’s that my former youth pastor Ozzy spoke to me and told me, he admired me because I have a warrior spirit, and I have so much potential that one day I will be something so Great that by me many will be inspired. He spoke life into, me proclaimed victory over my life. Words God knew I had to hear. These words reveal that I am not vain, or shallow, but that I want to have a purpose and be SOMONE.
As many people who don’t believe it the worst thing I believe that was ever said to me was said by my very own father. Being out of order a little that is a reason why it was the worst thing ever said to me. So you know I was minding my own business one day and out of nowhere my father starts questioning me like in every aspect of my life. I was so tongue twisted trying to answer that I just gave up. So what did he do? He sat there and said I would “never make it in life” and that I was going to “fail in college”. Beyond that he made a comment to how he doesn’t care about me or anything I do. I probably missed or left out a few details because it wouldn’t be too good to post them on here. Well I already said one reason why that was the worst, but also it was the worst because it effected my school work I was trying to figure out and that showed on my next report card. That just gave him more a reason to put me down and make me feel like I should fall off the earth. On top of that feeling, I probably cried for like 9 hours than didn’t/couldn’t sleep and came to school with purple under my eyes and feeling like I had no air around me. He took it all away when he said that I was a failure.
Better off the best thing ever said to me was about 3 years ago. I don’t remember it word for word, but it was from a guy named Steve and he was the best person in my life and today remains my best friend. So the nicest thing he ever said was on the lines of me not being fake. He named everything about me that he loved and I remember it was all like my personality. It was how I am fun, but mellow and just anything else and as low as I think about myself all the time he made me realize everything I thought was not true. He made me look inside myself and see that I am not a bad person and I am a lot better than others “read” me as. Hearing this was the best compliment because I always said to myself I didn’t want to be a fake person, but I felt like one. As I said, he made me see what I didn’t think existed bringing out the person I want to be and not letting me be anything different. That compliment helped and that is why when I read this blog I knew this answer before the first one.
Well both of these have changed my looks on life. I went from a happy child to depressed cause my dad, and because of Steve, I figured out a lot about myself and realized I am not that bad of a person. The cruelest thing ever said doesn’t reveal anything except that my father is mean to me a lot and it sucks. The nicest thing reveals that I am open-minded and ready to hear all opinions and take them into account in my life and my attitude.
it was a nice sunny day during the summer time. i was sixteen years old. i live and still live in the woodlands. everyday after school i would get off the bus to meet with my best friend avery.( hes coming soon ms bunje), anyway after i got off the bus i met up with him and we would stand outside and talk for a while. the other kids that got off the bus would just sit in the corner and smoke. i used to think, what does it feel like. that day i didnt know what was wrong with me. i was so curious. when i was younger,i would ask my prarents why do they smoke and they would be like because they are having a bad day and that their stressing. i told them to stop because i hated the smell and it started to affect me because i started having chest pains but they didnt listen, they were addicted. it made me angry, and i felt hurt. i felt as if they didnt care about me, and all of this was going through my head while i was talkng to avery. we stopped talking than i started walking to the dark side. i wasnt thinking. i went to one of my friends that were smoking and i said, let me get a pull. at first i starred at it and said to myself what am i doing. everybody was just looking at me, i looked around, and right before i put it in my mouth i hear a honk. i was doing the wrong thing at the wrong time. it was my mother. i was so shocked,i thought to myself and said aww sh**. she stopped the car and said get in the house,i started walking and my heart was beating so fast that i could even hear it. i got home and i seen my mom sitting down on the stairs just waiting for me. i looked at her and she looked at me. i said to her let me explain, but before i even tried to explain myself tears was just coming down her eyes. i felt so terrible inside and i knew she was disappionted in me. i couldnt even say anyting anymore because tears were running down her eyes and it made me want to cry. we stood silent and she looked at me and said " YOU ARE A BUM, YOUR DIRTY AND I DONT WANT TO SEE YOU TONIGHT, AND I SWEAR IF YOU DONT GO TO COLLEGE, DONT EVER THINK ABOUT COMING BACK IN MY LIFE " she said the exact words and than went upstairs. at that point i thought my heart stopped. i felt like giving up on life but didnt, i went up stairs and spoke to her. i told her evrything and i told her iam never going to smoke ever in life. i told her i love her and made her happy, that was one of the worst days i have ever had and iam going to remember it until i die and i never want to see my mom cry anymore and going to do the best i can to keep her happy.
If I think back on things that people have said to me its hard to pick what the worst thing and the best thing actually is. But one thing that comes to mind when thinking of bad things that were ever said to me has to be when my mom or dad has ever told me that they were disappointed in me. Its not even that they were mad at me. It was the fact that they were disappointed in what I did. No one wants to let anyone down. You always want to live up to your potential and do the right things. When I was told that I disappointed my mom or dad it made me feel horrible. I felt like complete crap. They just didn’t say they were disappointed but they give that look that just eats you alive. Then comes the best thing that anyone has ever told me. This is probably the hardest thing to think of. But as of now the only thing that comes to mind would be the complete opposite of my worst. It was the day that my dad told me that he was proud of me. All my life I did all that I could to live up to my dads standards. I always have wanted to make him proud of me. I would do whatever I had to do to make him happy. Now I didn’t always do the best of job at living up to what he liked but then one day he just sat me down and told me that he was proud of me for all that I do and all the things that I try to do. When he said this to me it gave me a feeling that was like no other. It filled my whole body completely. I felt like I had done good and it was just so great to hear. It also had me feeling a little worried after I thought about what he had told me. Now that he said he was proud of me I had to keep up what I was doing and also step up my game even more. There was no way that I could let him down or disappoint him after he just told me how proud he actually was of me. I think that these to things say that I try to do my best with everything that I do and I don’t like to let people down.
Words! I never really understood them. I’ve never understood how simple words like I hate you or I love you could have such a drastic impact on a persons emotions when there just words. Even though I’ve tried over and over to view words for merely what they are I, like everyone else in the world, am affected by words hateful, loving, contradicting words. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” What a lie that is! Words as unfortunate as it may be can be the cruelest yet most beautiful thing known to mankind. “You are a beautiful beautiful girl but you are an evil person with an evil heart.” Those words had to be the most painful words I’ve ever had to hear in my entire life. Its not like I haven’t heard variations of hurtful words like that said to me by my parents before, I mean at times they’ve even gone to the extent of telling me how much I disgust them. Regardless of how cruel words can be I’ve always tried to not let them tare me down physically or mentally but it wasn’t until my step mom uttered those exact words about my evil heart that I began to question my entire existence. Even now, after much time has passed, I can still hear my step mom say those awful words as if she were standing right next to me. Was she right? Am I just some heartless “beautiful” girl? What’s the point of beauty if evil is what you truly are? Am I just hiding myself being a mask? As much as I try to ignore my step moms words, every now and then they’ll haunt my thoughts and tears almost always seems to make their way down my face. It honestly boggles my mind how powerful words can be, but for all the hateful words that I’ve heard I think I’ve heard just as many healing and loving words. This past year I’ve actually moved out on my own due to my mothers misleading intentions and some unfortunate circumstances. It was in the summer, I packed all my belongings and pretty much knew that there was no turning back after I left. My back towards my house door, I walked into a new world of independence. I was scared and felt more alone then ever until my mom had to get her last words in. “There’s no doubt in my mind you won’t make it all on your own, I know you’ll be fine so have a good life.” I still wonder if she meant that in a positive or negative way but either way for some reason after she said that I couldn’t help but smile. Evil or not I’m a strong girl and words are just like another bump in the road of life, yeah at first their hard to get over and overcome but eventually I can progress and move on with new insights and new confidence. People will always try and break you down whether its through words or actions. But, if you have the strength to pick yourself up after being knocked down and the confidence to know that you can make it on your own no what anyone says then words, in a sense, can serve the purpose for what they really are, which is just words!
People have always said mean things to me. One thing I always hear is "I can't take you seriously enough.." How can I go through life where no one can take me seriously? I don't think it's fair, but of course I brought it upon myself, so I guess i deserve it. It holds me back from so much. lets assume someone is making fun of me, and i ask them to stop. Now imagine that it's happening very often and there is nothing I can do about it becuase they jsut laugh at me and tihnk I'm joking along with them. The truth is they can't take me seriously enough where if i got mad they would laugh harder and poke at me more. How could I teach someone how to tie their shoe if they are going to laugh at me the whole time? It's so sad. Everytihng that comes out of my mouth is a joke, or atleast most would think. The serious things i say and ad in are shocking to a lot of people, so I mask them with jokes and twist them around to sound less serious. I have myself to blame. The best compliment I recieved......gosh I don't even know. How did you interperet gosh? less seriously I assume! Really though Tarah has said a lot of nice tihngs to me, and I'm sure my friends have too. My personality is weird, I don't get it. I haven't figured out how i work yet. today in class we talked about how I cold really be shy and I just mask it with outgoing abilities. That's terrible to think about It's like I'm a liar to so many people? but it also made me think that it could be twisted too much and there is no way I'm shy! Pretty much destracted me from the blog!
To be honest, since I read this blog, I have been dreading to do it because I don’t even want to remember the worst things that have been said to me; there have been more than a few trust me. I would have to say that there is a tie for the worst thing that has even been said to me and that award goes to my best friend and my father. It sucks knowing that the worst things that have been said to me, came out of the two most important people in my life’s mouths. But then again, I suppose that’s what made it hurt that much more. I was battling with self mutilation problems since seventh grade and just two years ago, I finally felt it was time to come clean with my best friend about it. Well, of course she got very upset and angry that I was doing it and had kept it from her for so long. She expressed this by saying “I hope you cut yourself too deep and bleed to death.” Just a few months ago, my father found out about my passion for nicotine and was highly pissed off seeing his sister passed away a year and a half ago from cancer caused by smoking. He expressed how he felt by saying “Why don’t you just go do heroine and kill yourself faster.” I think these two phrases hurt me the worst for three reasons; 1) They were said by the two people I most care about. 2) They were both pertaining to me killing myself. 3) Neither of them ever took back or apologized for what they had said. These two phrases made me feel lower than dirt on the bottom of a show and actually, to an extent made me consider what they had said. It made me feel horrible knowing that they both meant it because if they did, they would have at least have said they were sorry for it.
The best think that someone has ever said to me was, “You have worked so hard to get where you’re at now and I am pleased to say that you have made it to level 5.” In the rehab that I went to, many of the girls left on either level 3 or 4, but there has only been two level 5’s in years and I had accomplished it. This was probably the best compliment because it showed me that I still can make it after hitting rock bottom and make an influence to not only myself, but the other girls who I encountered with. Although I have fallen back into bad habits, it is that phrase that helps me believe that I can always get my life back on track; I just have to want to do it and put the effort into it.
I think these two incidents prove that the people who matter in my world are the ones who’s words will hurt me the most. I care about what other people think about me and take what they say to heart. I also believe that I do go back to previous stated compliments and try to use them as a guide to help me improve myself even more with whatever I may be going though.
This is tough because just like many of the others who already commented this, I too have a knack for forgetting about the negative things I hear from people. At least the negative things that are just insults and would be no way beneficial for me to listen to. Sure, I can take some harsh constructive criticism but if someone just decides to try and make me feel down about myself then I try not to hold onto that memory for too long. Right now I am finding it extremely difficult to recall such a time where I heard the worst thing ever said to me, Heck I can barely remember what happened only a week ago in my life. Which is a problem that I believe is plaguing the American Society like rapid fire. Everyone is becoming forgetful and the attention span of the average American is probably no more than 20 minutes…on a good day. But that’s beside the point.
I suppose I could relate the worst thing ever said to me with something I’ve probably heard from my parents. No, it was not something like your ugly and have no friends, which is true regardless. But it definitely cut me deep and not only crushed some of my dreams but made me think of myself personally as a future failure. I can’t exactly remember how the conversation came up but about two years ago my parents would shut me down on a daily basis whenever I said I wanted to become a sponsored snowboarder. Now since you already know about this aspiration of mine Ms. Bunje I won’t go into detail about how it’s my dream and whatnot but lets just say they told me this. “Stop dreaming about stupid things like snowboarding for a living. You have no chance; we don’t even live in the mountains! Even if we did it’s your school work you need to worry about not snowboarding. It can only be a hobby to you, you have no chance of making it big, if you keep thinking like this you won’t do anything with your life and won’t even get into a good college. You’ll be working for minimum wage and will be miserable. Just stop talking about snowboarding, it’s a waste an will never be anything more than a pastime.”
Now to me, this crushed me. It may not sound too harsh to many people but I suppose if you replaced snowboarding with anyone of your favorite pastimes and wanted to do nothing more than succeed in it than I’d say you’d be hurt as well. Now of course at first I wanted to prove them wrong, but after hearing something enough you start to believe what people tell you and since I heard a variation of that depressing speech each day it started to sink into my head. I had even given up last year, however thankfully this year I had a renewed spirit about boarding and the funny thing is now they support me more than ever because they always hear from other people that I am decently skilled at the sport. Now I sound conceited but it doesn’t happen much so I am just going to get it out of the way now.
As for compliments, well… the ones that usually mean the most to me I guess would be from my teachers. I don’t know why but for some reason its just a great feeling when it seems as though one of my mentors is proud of me. Even though my peers in general also have a great effect on me as well, just not as much as my teachers. Like let’s just say I may have secretly snuck a little peek at the rec. letter you just made for me last period today. I won’t go into detail as to what it said because you wrote it so I’d be telling you what you already did. When I read this letter I can’t explain how I felt. All I could do was smile, and even if you do secretly not like me and that was just a nice letter for the sake of helping me out I still can’t explain how joyful it made me feel. For some reason whenever I experience such an event where I get a compliment from a higher power it hits me harder than any other flattering remark I could receive. It’s even better than when my parents say they are proud of me, and even though I sound like a total idiot right now I don’t even care! Because it’s the truth and I’m all about dat jaunt!
As for how people react to the things they hear, well I know that it most definitely tells a lot about somebody. If people get really upset or angry and start to get extremely defensive when an insult is thrown at them then it may show signs of insecurity. They may feel the need to defend themselves so that they can maintain some sort of image in other people minds, or at least that’s what they think is necessary to maintain that image. Now if someone can just laugh it off or walk away from it, it shows signs of security, even if deep down it sort of bothers them. They are able to stay cool, calm and collective or maybe they just don’t really worry about it. To me it is the people who can walk it off and don’t let the bad words get to them who are stronger in a way. I would fall under the second category because I am able to laugh at and criticize myself in front of others because it doesn’t bother me. So yes, the way in which we react to these cruel and kind comments absolutely says a lot about us, unless of course it is just our “persona” in which case I suppose our mask would be the thing reacting to the words as opposed to our real selves. 1,008 words isn’t too many right?! haha
words are the only things that people have to express there feelings outloud. a bunch of different letters put in the wrong order could hurt alot. there is the saying sticks and stones will break ur bones but names will never hurt you, i dont believe in that all all. words are very powerful and cause alot of different emotions. there are quite a few things that stick out in my mind to be the worst things that someone has ever said to me, but i think the worst one has got to be when someone close to me said you'll never amount to anything and put down my choice of a career. this made me feel like i was worthless and could never become what i always wanted to be. this is the worst thing for me because it was said by someone really close to me and it has affected the way i think about myself. on the flipside its always harder to remember the good things that people say but the best thing that i can think of that someone has said to me was actually said by you bunje. you said to me sophmore year while reading the last occasinal paper when you speak your voice carries unimaginable power and you are very wise to choose where and when to do so. this really meant alot to me because noone has every made my shyness into a positive thing, you were the first to prove that to me and i really appericate that. these two things said to me reveal alot about my personality because the worst thing said has made me want to shut down and not allow people tho know how i feel about certian things with the fear of being put down. also the best thing said to me helped me realize that me being shy is not always a bad thing and i have come a long way with it. i feel more confident about myself then i did a few years ago and simple words like that have helped me along the way.
Bunj you’re 38?! I would have guessed 27, tops.
The art of speech is a very powerful instrument that is stronger than any weapon and more soothing than the softest song. Without speech there would be no basis for anything: Why we love, hate, laugh, and cry. I consider speech an art because words can be put in countless sequences to portray countless ideas. It’s an art that takes time to master but once mastered it has the power to control entire nations and to lead them to, in the worst cases, perform genocides for reasons that the people involved may not agree with, yet they are doing it because their leader has learned how to use words to manipulate others. Words can start as well as stop wars. They can cause someone to fall in love with, as well as despise another person. Words can be writing down and turned into best selling books or scripts to blockbuster movies. Words truly are amazing.
Words have the power to leave scars. Personally I don’t let too many words hurt me. Someone may think I’m ugly, as rare as that sounds, and it really doesn’t bother me because that’s their opinion. When someone critiques one of my skills such as my musical talent, I just compare my skill to theirs and if they’re worse than I find that funny that they’re criticizing me. If they happen to be better than me, though, then they somewhat have the right to critique me, I just take that as constructive criticism which means I have to practice more. One statement has resonated in my mind though. A few years ago when I was going through what I like to call my “scumbag” phase when I started following the wrong crowd, I came home late to find my parents fairly upset with me. After a few minutes of arguing my mom said, “You don’t even look like my son anymore.” and ever since then that statement has stuck in my head. To hear something like that from someone you love can hurt, but I’m glad that was said because it made me rethink my decisions and change my life around. I think that this shows that I am a person who cares what the people close to me think about me.
On the other hand, I’ve had statements leave a positive impression on me. Even though it was during a dismal time, the words spoken by a little old black woman at my grandmother’s funeral has left me with a very positive resonation that is stuck in my head. When she stood up to announce her part of the eulogy she started talking about how she knew my grandmother from church. Then she went on to say how proud my grandmother was of me. To fill in some information about my relationship with my grandmother, I thought she was a little crazy. She was overly religious and she preached to me all the time. Because of this, I tended to stray away from her teaching because I disliked the constant preaching. This caused me to do a lot of things that she didn’t approve of. To her that my grandmother was so proud of me even though I went against what she always tried to teach me made me realize how much she loved me which left me a clear conscience about my relationship with my grandmother in the end of her life. I think this shows that I’m a proud person and to know that my family supports me even though they might not agree with me, shows that I value my family and that they value me.
No matter what is said, I try to hold on to the more compassionate things said to me as well as the more meaningful things I hear. I think this helps me stay positive through negative times and keep an optimistic attitude.
People say things about me and tried to hurt me but I can't really think of anything that stands out over them all. Usually, I don't argue with people. It goes nowhere because arguing is stupid.(Unless it's sports and competition!) Words don't really affect me that much maybe since I had to deal with all the short jokes since I was a kid haha. Also, I've been through some things so I feel that my mind is pretty wise and strong. I don't recall anyone every trying to seriously break me down and blow away my self-esteem. But I do get some compliments. I guess the best compliments I get are that I am a very kind/nice/determined person. I can't single anyone out who said it because a lot of my close friends have said and many others. I think that these two things reveal that I have a strong personality. I can take the heat without taking it out on others. Kind of like a air conditioner. I take the hot air and blow it out cool. Also, sorry I did this last minute Ms. Bunje! I got home pretty late today and just remembered the blog right as a layed down to go to sleep.
At first this blogg seemed to be one of the hardest bloggs I’ve seen yet, but I really didn’t have to give it much thought until one memory popped in my head. It is actually one of my earliest memories and has somehow stuck with me all these years, although I wish it hadn’t.
When I was about 5 years old my father passed away. I remember that day so clearly it feels as if it were yesterday. It was when my grandmother dropped me off at my parent’s house one afternoon. I jumped out of the car expecting to burst into the house and jump into my father’s arms, but instead I ran through the door to see my mother crying. I had no idea what was going on until my grandmother explained what had happened. A couple days went by and I was with my mom collecting my father’s stuff from the house before we moved. Although my grandmother had explained that my father had passed away I don’t think I really understood the concept. I asked my mom “why we were taking all the stuff wont dad need it when he gets back?” my mother immediately broke down in tears and amidst all of the sobbing my mother said “daddys not coming back” I forget the rest of the conversation but those words are forever engraved in my mind. This is when I finally realized that I no longer had a father. Even to this day I still get teary eyed every time I think of this day, it will forever be the worst thing anybody had ever said to me.
As for the best thing that anybody has ever said to me, nothing has really come to mind. Nothing throughout my life has stood out enough for me to remember. So I guess, and I know this is a lame answer, I am going to have to say that the best thing that anybody has ever said to me is when my mom says “I love you” although I don’t give it much thought when she does say it I know that she means it and knowing that someone loves you with all their heart is a great feeling.
Sorry its sooo late. I just haven’t had a chance to get to the computer ..wont happen again. Promise =]! But I really don’t remember what’s the worst thing someone has said to me. Like I have had mad times of arguments and stuff but nothing really serious. But now that I come to think of it, someone did say something to me about my mother that I didn’t take to likely. So I’m guessing that counts right?. Well it was a while ago I was probably in the 7th or 8th grade. I was hanging outside with some friends and were just being us I guess you could say. Well we were sitting on a neighbors porch and we had left our bags there. We were going to play some football then come back. But when we leave, I had left something on there porch and ran back to get it. When I go to reach for what ever it was this boy comes out, and tells me to get off his porch,. He was probably a year older than me or about the same age. But the thing was that he took my friends bags and threw them over the balcony be cause he didn’t want it there so I yelled back at him, saying he had no right to do that, that it wasn’t bothering him and etc. Well I start to get really mad and he starts coring and saying a bunch of other crap. He than has the nerve to call my mother (excuse my language) A B****. And from there I just lost it. The feeling of anger and rage ran through me like some just ignited a flame. At that time, and even to this day, I never allow anyone to disrespect my mother in any kind of way. So I completely lost it. I started screaming back at him telling him to come out his house and face me, but he was such a coward. He ran inside his house before I could get to him. I ran to his door and started banging on it. Then i went to the sliding door and started to kick it. And keep in mind it was glass. It took all four of my friends to restrain me and move me away. But that still dint take way the fact that he got away with calling my mother that. Eventually his mother came out and we both started screaming at each other. At this time was when my friends ran to mom and told her what was happening and she came to stop me. But I wasn’t trying hear it. His mother was probably 400 lbs and I was ready to punch her dead in her face. She kept saying I had no respect for adults that my mother couldn’t raise me right and a whole bunch of nonsense. And I was just like look at your son, you couldn’t even raise him to take a right shower and how to brush his teeth and you talking about me? ( keep in mind also I wasn’t as mature as I was not back hen). But my whole point was that I didn’t care who or what she did, but that her son would not get away with disrespecting me and my mother like that. So we continued to argue until I got to her face and was like fight me now. No matter fact get your son out here and we’ll finish it right here. That boy never came out the house. But I caught him a few days later and gave him what he deserved. But Until this day everyone laughs at him from trying to be all big to turn out to be a coward. But that was one of the worst things anyone could probably say to me. And something good someone has said to me would probably that I am a well raised and behaved person. It was said by a few people, and I consider this the best because it shows that my parents rose me right and that others recognize it also. This two things reveal a lot about me, it shows that I do mind my own business and am quiet but that doesn’t mean I don’t get mad like everyone else, and that I’m a good person I guess.
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